Black Dog Blog

Make a list of 5 things you can see without getting up:

• Quiver trees (Aloe dichotoma) in Richtersveld National Park, South Africa (this picture), because I finally got bored of the ice floes and turned the calendar page over.
• Bob's Quick Guide to the Apostrophe, You Idiots, printed out and stuck to the divider thingy at the back of my desk.
• Ten unmatched jigsaw pieces that I collected one day by the railway level crossing out of joy that such things would be unexplainedly scattered there.
• A little bright green plastic windmill (like a cocktail toy or party favour), which is a Super Secret Symbol of Freedom. It stands up because I cunningly pushed the the wooden stick through the bottom of an inverted plastic cup and then fixed the bottom with some Blu-Tack. The spirit of Blue Peter permeates this organisation, I tell you.
• An article about an ex-Nasa scientist who does origami, cut out from a newspaper. I have yet to make the origami snail from the directions in there, but I will.

It seems my desk is more personalised than I realised. And more untidy.

How do you style your hair?
"Short back and sides, please". If you mean what do I do with it when I get up in the morning, I brush it. If you mean how do I dry it, I towel what I can and let mother nature do the rest.

What are you wearing now?
A buff-coloured collarless shirt with mud (see below) on the left sleeve. Black slacks and my black ankle boots, a little muddy for unrelated reasons. A black baseball cap with a C and two Bs on it, a solar-charged watch of which I'm rather fond, contact lenses and underwear. A neutral expression.

Who was the last person you said 'I Love You' to?
I don't think I've said that outside childhood.

Do you nap a lot?
Only in meetings. Er. I'm trying to cut back on that.

Who was the last person you hugged?
What constitutes a hug? Held in my arms, whispered endearments to and rubbed heads with? That was this morning. The somewhat violent endearments ("You stink and I'm going to kill you" – these pass for endearments in my case) were followed by "On reflection, this may have been a bad idea". The reason for this was that I'd just realised about the muddy pawprints all up my sleeve. I have to work in this shirt, damn you.

I don't think this qualifies as a hug, but I did get a lot of kisses and (cleaner) paws up my arm from a dog outside the pharmacy on the way to work. I don't know what it was – like a very large Staffie. I want one. Those blunt, flat-topped HEADS and that bad waggy TAIL.

What TV character would you most like to meet in real life?
IMDb lists nine television adaptations of The Hound of the Baskervilles, hey?

Other choices, hmm. Lassie. I'd like to buy Irene Adler a drink. Oh, and meeting either first-season Mohinder Suresh or Hiro Nakamura from Heroes would be likely to be fun. I could quiz Suresh on how he talks so much bollocks about genetics given that he's supposed to be a geneticist, and hear him splutter about it in that rather gorgeous voice of his (which I will steal some day, oh yes). And Nakamura, well, we both like waffles. Oh, I know! A couple of Pratchett novels have been adapted for TV, so: Death. And Gaspode.

What was the last thing you ate today?
Low fat houmous. Shut up.

What was the last text message you received?
No mobile phone, but I did get an AQA texted to my brother for a laugh, just in case Charly got the question. The answer claimed Hazz is the most handsome member of Miniluv and that he makes the ladies go wild, which – no offence to drummers anywhere – I find myself reluctant to believe without photographic evidence.

What websites do you always visit when you go online?
At home, obviously: Profusion, home of fantasy and scifi collaborative writing and roleplay, email (if I don't have Thunderbird open), Gmail (nicer interface than Thunderbird anyway), two LJ friends filters, pholph.com (because it's one of the few comics I read that doesn't have a feed, curse you Tet), usually Neopets, usually check Twine. I almost always use Google for something, too, and often Wikipedia, Darklyrics and reference.com. I have a few news feeds set up in Google Reader, but am never arsed checking them.

What was the last thing you bought?
Just been to Sainsbury to break my fast with carrot batons (they didn't have any mangetout. Pout), low fat houmous and Diet Coke with Citrus Flavour Aspartame. Yes, all right, extremely girly, no need to rub it in.

What are you listening to right now?
Office ambience. Drone of one male voice to my left-left-front, cackling female to my front right, tictac of my keyboard.

What's the last song that got stuck in your head?
Don't Fear the Reaper, Blue Öyster Cult, is playing right now. I don't know why, but it's guaranteed to be a hideous pun. My brain does that all the time. (And if I wasn't filling in this meme backwards as is my habit, it'd be Meat Loaf's Paradise by the Dashboard Light.)

If you could have any superpower, what would it be?
Teke, obviously. It's the granddaddy of all superpowers. For recreational purposes, shapeshifting, and teleporting would be useful too.

What is your favourite weather, and why?
For beauty's sake, light snow that doesn't settle (given that, beauty aside, I still have to walk to and from the station each day). To be out and about in, I'll settle for anything dry with moderate temperature. I love the wind in my face.

If you could play any musical instrument, which one would you play?
Electric bass is most likely. I don't really have a strong urge to play any instrument. Sing, perhaps, if only I had a deep enough voice.

How are you?
How? I just am; I don't have to try or anything! Epic!

What's something you'd like to say to someone right now?
I'd like to burst into a cheesy song from a musical at someone.

Your dream career?
I basically already have it, I think: something I do for money and leave at the office when I go home, ready to do my own thing with the rest of my time.

What's your favourite flavour of ice cream?
A few different Ben & Jerry's kinds – Cookie Dough, occasionally Phish Food (it's a bit rich), Caramel Chew Chew and Cherry Garcia (I think? cherry and dark chocolate bits)… well, I think I've liked all of theirs that I've tried. To avoid sounding like a B&J advert, I also like pistachio ice cream, and mint choc chip, and once had this very nummy melon flavour (yes, ice cream, not sorbet, quite weird). If anyone makes me this, I will immediately make you my wife.