Black Dog Blog

Archive for the ‘health’ Category

Brrrr. I'm either ill or just vaguely run down after this week, which has been kind of a doozy. Last night I was completely out of it, and I mean unable to talk, let alone do anything else; symptoms that, when I flipped back through my mental notebook, I found next to a pencilled annotation reading "←Stress?"

I hope taking it sedentary over this weekend will get me back on my feet, but the cold weather isn't helping. I don't want to go for walks or do anything but huddle with hot water bottles. I definitely hope I won't be ill-definedly sickish all this winter, because the novelty there wears off fast, I can tell you from experience.

NaNoWriMo writing has completely stalled. I won't make the 50k, that's a given, but I'll easily get to 30k over the weekend. Heck, just writing up what I've handwritten on my tram journeys should take care of that.

All that's still to go on Part Two, after transcribing my own handwriting, is some wrapping up on Taupeshank's side. Taupe needs to realise in what ways pe's been rather silly, while Alluring… well. Let's face it. Alluring Swiper isn't learning any Important Moral Lessons any time soon. Alluring considers nerself far too fabulous for Important Moral Lessons.

Lest anyone accuse me of writing only heroes I agree with 100%, this section features binge drinking, the afore-alluded ass-headedness and a downright fist fight. Part Three features FIRE! Also bribery, but mainly FIRE. (Could fire really be a problem on a planet that's 95% water? You bet.)

(Old news, actually, but I've only just come across it.)

Condom condom condom condom

At a wedding!

And no, the post tags are not lying. This was made by the WST. Now that's awesome.

A Buddhist preacher in Thailand has announced plans for new guidelines aimed at curbing the flamboyant behaviour of gay and [male-to-female] transgender monks.

Oh Buddha, not… effeminately-shaped eyebrows!!1onetynine11!!!

Children's Laureates choose best books of all time. Just William ++, Treasure Island of course, Harry Potter nowhere on the list.

Also, I want a Psammead. They're rewarding companions. Just don't get them wet or feed them after midnight.

What is swine flu?

Israel renames unkosher swine flu

I gave blood this evening. They looked askance at me afterwards because I'm so tired-looking and kept me for a while for observation. When I didn't keel over (although one other patient looked alarmed and said I was going pale!¹) they let me meander on home, which is only a short walk in any case.

(I felt like saying "You shoulda seen me this morning. And all day at work. And all week, in fact." I've been looking pretty dazed for a long time, however much sleep I get, and we're talking up to 9hrs a night which is more than enough for anyone healthy.)

I have a Penguin biscuit. Seeing as I p-p-p-paid in blood for it, I am going to keep and consume it. If I can stabilise my weight, anyway; alarmingly, last weekend I gained like a kilo and a half for NO GORRAM REASON, SRSLY, I'd REMEMBER if I'd eaten anything fun, JEEZ could we randomly LOSE weight instead ya think?!

So, tomorrow is a bank holiday, then it's the weekend and then I have a week booked off work. Which is good. I owe some things, including an art exchange picture and replies to some emails, and want to finish off that little Suitov-Mistake story shortly. Also, need a haircut. When it gets to this length it curls up cutely at the ends, which, while obviously extremely manly, is not quite the effect I desire.

Next Tuesday: GeekUp or Magers? What a hectic social calendar. Stay tuned as my divided loyalties yawn, stretch and then serenely do whichever it was they were intending to do all along.

¹ I responded with an interested "Really?", checked my pulse (well, tried to find one and couldn't, which is usual) and then pinched my fingertips to check their flush reaction and temperature. "Hmm, they are somewhat cold." This coming from someone who had previously been slouching with a head cupped in one hand, elbow resting on the table, drooping eyelids and generally appearing semi-conscious, may have been a socially inappropriate response. It's possible I was supposed to have been alarmed instead or go and lie down or ask someone to loosen my stays or something. Probably just as well I didn't whip out a Von Luschan chart and ask him to quantify "pale". Oh well, they're shot of me for another four months.

Race for 'God particle' heats up. Please nobody shout Foe Yay or post LHC/Fermilab Rule 34 in the comments. This is a classy blog.

As fans of The Daily Mail know, everything in existence either causes cancer or cures cancer (example: Facebook). An extremely scientific study has begun to document these for the good of humankind. I give you The Daily Mail Oncological Ontology Project.

Also, grandmother playing Guitar Hero. I recognise the Easy difficulty of Pat Benatar's Hit Me With Your Best Shot, so you can tell I'm about on her level.

edit: some artwork and photography from dA's daily selection. Dog + snow = ♥

For Anke: Hello guys, kitties and something indescribable. And this, even though the corn is wrong and makes me very sick to look at *whimpers*.

Red pandas with an inescapable Now We Are Six vibe, cuddling, cartoony pandas (interesting take on the mask), a portly and catlike take that truly earns their nickname of 'catbear', a slightly more raccoonish-mousy-feline look, unhappy plushie toys, superdeformed legless versions (good face on the left one, though), some clearly drawn by an animator, a gorgeous painting if you excuse the love heart, NINJA PANDA and hilarity ensuing (I may have posted this one before).

Amazingly enough, there's also a new pangolin since last I looked. And have a cloud pard to round off the furfest.

Am coming off the diet after speaking to the GP today. I'm down to 79kg at the moment, which is 10kg better off than I was to begin with – even with a break for Christmas yumyums in the middle. So, nice, and I haven't given up hope of losing more: I plan to continue for a while with lots of green veg and protein as I was while on the sachets anyway.

I stopped because I can't wake up in the mornings, even after 8–9 hours of sleep, and can't stop myself falling asleep in meetings at work. I don't know what it is about meetings; it's not even hot or unventilated rooms. It seems to be when (certain?) voices are talking at length. It's rather embarrassing. Nobody says anything…

Although a couple of the girls at work, during the course of a conversation at someone's leaving drinks, mentioned that they'd noticed I'd been losing "a lot of weight". I guess people do notice, it's just that they don't feel comfortable mentioning it apropos of nothing. I sometimes wonder if I'm excessively forbidding without meaning to be.

I mean, I thought girls usually can't get enough talk about diets. *ducks and runs*

I'm also really weak and very cold. It's heartening that I can manage with one heavy duvet instead of two now, but my fingers and toes still hate me in the cold weather. Figures. It's not as though I've lost any weight from them, they've just always hated me.Yes, foolish human, we have and do. Soon our time will come.

Also talked to the GP about medication and gendaargh. I'm still on the meds because if I stop them I quickly become overwhelmed by such disasters as dropping a fork from the dishwasher or not having any cabbage, let alone going out to places or writing. We talked about trying a larger dose for a month. I really want that feeling back, the one I had during the 'honeymoon' period in the first month or so. I felt so much more like myself, and it was very much a rush of god to the head. (I wonder if that's how people feel on intoxicants… I can't imagine any other reason people'd ingest them.)

Pope: "Stop claiming you've seen the Virgin Mary. You're making us look nuts."

Migraine-inducing artwork… no, truly. Really nice article about migraines and their causes.

Evil cats in the news (note name of second felin)

Back in work today.

Streaming nose.

Blocked right ear.

Foggy eyes.

Forecast lots of rain.

Sounds about right…

Well, a little year-end status report seems appropriate.

Way back in December 2007/January 2008 I thought I'd have a stab at writing a poem a week throughout the year. I made it to half the total, 26. You can read them here. That total includes some I'm genuinely proud of, such as the sonnets (Railing is my favourite; here are some kitties too) and Wefty's little apology/self-hatred/guilt trip/mourning poem (I don't care that it met with general apathy and criticism; I'm proud of it), as well as some lighter ones I wrote to amuse colleagues and others.

Plenty about dogs, too. A late favourite of mine is Country Road Meeting… not exactly light, but definitely enjoyable to write, and hell, I find it funny.

What did surprise me, and is one reason I'm laid-back about the poetry target, is that I suddenly started artsing again. I honestly never expected to use my Wacom tablet for anything serious again, after going through a particularly horrible time of hating my 'art'—and this was serious; I can't tell you how severely without scaring you—and generally thinking I'd never make another visual thing. I can't explain why I was able to pick up the stylus again, or why I did so, but it's been fun. The first thing I painted was a giant crow made of insects, which won me pictures of Weft as a furry in return. (It's impossible to explain to those not in the know how incredibly funny this is.) I laid into some huge projects, too, including a parrot, an elf (half) and a grandmother.

Other artwork included owl, dog with furry (I like this one a lot, probably because of the boar piglet), red panda (I should definitely do more of those), dog jumping, dog-in-costume, Egyptian wolf, sketch wolf, inky-style sceptical demon and human (warning: human).

Here also are some (sort of) kitties for you cat-loving epic(fail)ures.

A lot later in 2008, we set a deadline for "the end of the year" to start our epic Profusion project, formerly the 'Great War', which we've now retitled to 'The Twine Wars' to make it a little more distinctive. And all right, I left it until the last minute, and yes, technically it was 2009 in NZ already, but nevertheless, for readers in any time zone west of Finland's, the very first Twine Wars posting did indeed go up before the end of the year.

Which is nice, very nice. My major characters aren't yet in play this early in the storyline, but I can already tell I'm going to have fun with Paraskive Taxidies ("parra-skeevuh tax-ee-dee-ess"), my viewpoint character for this region, who is also one of my comparatively rare female characters.

If Weft would stop cuddling Sweetoff and get in character, I have prequel short stories to write for both of them, long before they met. I might even have yet another stab at drawing one or the other of them, too.

I'm also fatass again after going nuts over the holidays (sigh), but that is soooo temporary. Diet starts tomorrow. Well, technically today by now, but I'm finishing this can of lychees before bed, because DUDE LYCHEES. OM NOM NOM.

Work Christmas lunch yesterday, at a place in Castlefield called The Ox. It was tasty, the place was not crowded and the service was good. Also, apple and melon J₂O is too delicious (albeit a bit too sweet) and should be banned.

So. BBC Backstage/GeekUp party on Saturday at the Pitcher and Piano in Deansgate Locks. A great deal of fun. I helped out with BBCish stuff for a few minutes, but I was really there as a guest and had a good time. There were drinks paid for by Cubic Garden (yay!) and food laid on by the Beeb. There was a Wii that a room full of geeks couldn't get working properly (oh how I LOLd) and a Skype/Twitter link-up to London, where the other Backstage bash was happening simultaneously.

We were also invaded by Santas in the form of a fancy dress charity pub crawl.

edit: Pictures here. I don't see any of me, thank dog.

So I hung out with GeekUpprs and had free non-alcohol cocktails (Apple Mint, MMMM) and life was good. I sneaked my GeekUp Secret Santa gift/s in and left them by the food, anticipating that this would get them found quickly. The main gift was a picture of the recipient being mauled by Gemma's polecat, which apparently really happened. I found the details in the GeekUp archives. (I do my research, you see.) I didn't go over and introduce myself, but I saw the picture being passed around to general amusement, along with the little rhyme I wrote for the tag. I had help laminating these beforehand, which was a wise precaution. Plastic-wrapped is good when alcohol and free food are flowing.

Speaking of free food, yes, the diet is on hold and I am back in the grip of Brute Hunger. :-/ Have already bounced back up to 80kg. I must carry on the rest of this week as though I'm still on the sachets/green veg regime, or, knowing too well the raging animal that's under my skin, I'll just balloon. And that would be shit. Very, very shit. Because, to be honest, I like being less fat. I like it a lot.

My Secret Santa also gave me my gift on Saturday night, anonymously delivered in a jiffy bag by one of the employees. It is a Diet Coke bottle top and a roll of Mentos. XD If you don't know what happens when you put Mentos in Diet Coke, YouTube it.

Also, my hair is now short again. A bit shorter than I'd intended, even. That doesn't matter. It'll grow back – all too fast, no doubt.

What else? Finishing off birthday present for father. Almost all other presents are done. It's just the ones coming from overseas that I've still to receive and wrap.

I think I officially weigh less than I ever have in my adult life. My BMI is heading downwards and parts of me are shrinking. I think I'm also thinner than I managed on the last diet, judging by belt tightness, and although it's disheartening to realise that I'd gained girth in the interim even though my weight was holding constant, goshdarn it's good to need new trousers again. I also don't have any of the horrible mystery symptoms I had after coming off the diet last time, which suggests either that eating green veg and popping B12 this time around is being helpful for my health or that those symptoms weren't connected to the diet in the first place.

In other random news, I have discovered the joys of microwaveable wheat bags, which I like much more than microwaveable gel packs—although my feet have their own appreciation of the latter. The recent weather hasn't been as cold as that two-day freeze snap at the beginning of December. It's mainly grey and drizzly. Over the weekend I caught some winter sun for my solar-charged watch and then put it under a full-spectrum bulb for the evening, with the result that it's back on high battery instead of medium. I miss having a large windowsill at work that caught the afternoon sun!

Tonight I hope to get the last of my Xmas shopping done, along with the bulk of the remaining wrapping, provided that I can find some non-horrible paper (I'm thinking gold and green this year, but not holly, because I use the same paper for birthdays too. Abstract stripes or squares are far nicer anyway).

I will be spending every evening this week fighting my recalcitrant Graphire III to get somebody's present finished off, and then, providing some things I've ordered online get here in time, I'll have Christmas done, dusted and wrapped. How disgustingly organised!

So, to celebrate this, here's an offer. Would you like a picture from me for Christmas? Ask me before… let's say the 18th December 2008, British time for the sake of argument, and I'll give it a shot. I will draw anything you like, as long as it's either a non-humanoid animal or a machine. It will be a quick picture—probably something like this, which took me two and a half hours—and may or may not include background or props. Obviously, if it's not something for which I can find reference photos on the web, give me as much information as possible, preferably including picture links if you have any. Let me know if it's intended as a gift for someone else.

Terms and conditions: One picture per body. Open potentially to anyone. I'll show your picture off as I please afterwards. You can do whatever you want with it too, as long as you credit me as the artist. If a huge horde of randomers starts asking me for stuff, I'll give priority to the people I know. I'll do my best to make good on this offer but no guarantees. I'm doing this for fun and generosity, so don't abuse the spirit of the offer.

1.5 kilos down this week. Hurry up, man! I wanted to be under 80 by now. (I'm 80.45, so very close really.)

Seriously though, meatcarcase, can't you find more fat to drop? Because let me tell you I don't need an atlas to find several handfuls, if you know what I mean.

Ha. Also, I am going to start eating greens and protein. I'm too desperate for them¹, and if you're careful you can do this and still stay in ketosis (aka mega weight-drop area, aka starvation). So says a friend of the family who has flirted with this diet several times. (I could draw sarcastic conclusions about its long-term efficacy in her case and her resulting qualification to give advice, but she successfully drops weight every time, and that's all I need to do. I don't do the yoyo thing too badly, not judging by holding steady for almost a year in this interval.)

Oh, and I finally have my prescription refilled as of this morning. Luckily my mother and I are on the same dosage of the same med, so there can be intercaninenecine pill-scrounging. The delay, as it turns out, is that they wanted to speak to me before refilling it, so I need to make an appt. Which means getting there and taking time off work, both of which cause me bearable anxiety.

I spent all weekend gaming round at my unbrother's house and I have surprisingly few regrets about that. Although I'm ready to make myself some art and code now. Speaking of Art with a capital A, aka Tet, I think his deadline on the art exchange is today, so I may or may not bother doing the quick sketch I'd planned. He's popular because he admins the server, so lots of ass-kissers will have given him pictures. ;)

More microformats today. I've finished converting a huge "useful contacts" table from bad HTML into better HTML plus lots of span class=vcards. My eyes are now crossing. And I've forgotten what I was actually supposed to be changing about it in the first place. Wahoo!

¹ At least, let's optimistically assume that the sustained intense urge to rip apart people/trees/Quorn roasts and gorge on their insides signifies a craving for protein and roughage. Let's have no more gentle games of rough-and-tumble with the cat only to pause and realise I'm chewing his scruff rather enthusiastically, or anything like th…
…not that I've ever done that, you realise. It was a random example, haha. Erm.
Plus, maybe I can finally stop dreaming about food. The whole "oh noes I broke my diet by accident" stress dream archetype was never cool or original, and it's looking pretttty hackneyed by now.

MASS VANQUISH continues! I'm below 82kg this morning. I'm only overweight now, not obese, according to this.

It'll be a long, cold road to Xmas, but I have the willpower. It's just rather annoying that this isn't as easy as last time. I'm ravening and my cravings are flickering over the range of caninely-edibles faster than plasma tendrils in a little glass ball.

I don't know how much of the problem is depression, mind. I always was a comfort binger.

As long as I have enough electronics to keep me distracted I'm ok. The problem comes when there isn't an internet connection, console or video recorder, and I'm alone with my cold, unhappy mood and no dog. That's when I want to attack a point cabbage/bag of cashew nuts/Quorn roast/pot of natural Greek yoghurt…

I could combine the first three with some onion and be a very very happy alpha. Nevertheless, I do have the willpower. Good to know I still have, I suppose.

The plan remains! 60kg or until so ill I'm told to stop! Woo! (Actually, mid-60s is more sensible, because 60 is on the low end for someone as short as me. Either way, like all right-minded people, I want to bid the 70s goodbye.)

I'm back on the Lipotrim sachets as of this morning.

This time I'm breaking 60kg… or getting so ill trying that I have to stop.

I'm feeling quite happy about the choice, which was made last night under circumstances to which we'll come shortly. I've kept steady at 85kg, which is where I stabilised soon after coming off the diet last time, for—however long it's been. *looks it up* Since July last year. Just recently, though, it's been creeping up and I've found myself unable to lose those stubborn 2kg, 3kg… 4 this morning.

I think part of it is the cold weather, made worse at work by evil air con and at home by evil non-working boiler. Coupled with carrying a lot less weight than I'm used to, this is making me hungry for very much the wrong things. My willpower's also crap recently, which is annoying because I've been damned good for a year.

But yeah, the weekend was double plus ungood. A doubly bad day on Saturday cost me most of a tub of Häagen-Dazs (never let it be said that I deal with my problems in a mature, head-on, adult way) and on Sunday, although better than the previous day, I just hadn't the heart to cook up a mess of vegetables, and then the brothers were getting pizza and yeah. "Fuck the diet," I said to myself, "the diet starts tomorrow."

And so this morning I nodded affably at the scales that so rudely told me 89.0, strolled along to the pharmacy I pass on the way to work, and sweet-talked them into letting me start right away. Cha-ching.

Also, Slen has moved out and now has a house of his very own! (Well, rented.) This deserves more than a footnote in an entry that's all "me me me", so I'll give you the skinny, pun intended, later on.

Ugh, metallic taste in the back of my throat. I can't tell if it's the eye infection (I tasted metal all the time my tooth was infected, too) or the spray deodorant I've been using the last few days (I normally use a 48hr roll-on – much kinder on skin).

UGH.

Either way, I don't like the taste of heavy metal. (I wonder what hyper speedy happy power metal tastes like. I think it tastes like pomegranate, white grape, peach and white chocolate. Not that I'm saying I'm a woofter or anything, oh no…)

Also, one of my 'spensive earbuds went and broke on me this morning. >:( Next time I'm getting external noise-cancelling ones. I prefer in-ear, but they're too damn fragile. Ah well, another thing to research and purchase.

Oh yes, need messenger bag too. Rucksack's zip is barely holding on to life. I've had this thing since my uni days, despite not particularly liking it (think it was a present). I don't replace stuff until it unequivocally dies. (I'm going to go for an expensive type recommended by people on GeekUp as very robust.)

Which reminds me, new battery for QuadruPod too. Darn stuff. Roll on biotech engineered from invasive nanomycelia, I say! Or, alternatively, solar patches and motion power.

Pedigree dogs plagued by disease. This, to be fair, does depend somewhat on the breeder. For example, when my father got his dog it had to be a pedigree (of course *rolls eyes*) and the breeder had certificates to show that their dogs were free of hip dysplasia, which is a notorious problem with Labs and Goldens. Breeders aren't daft and pretty much know what they're doing, so if you get one who thinks it pays to be ethical you should be relatively ok.

Puppy farmers, on the other hand, should be suspended from the annoyingly loud industrial-style air conditioning pipes in this office and flogged with… hmm… those empty coat hangers and drying umbrellas over there. Yeah, ok, I'll think up something more creative when my brain's switched on.

Another clip.

An ailing brain with imagination undimmed

You're Britain's second best-selling author, also called the most shoplifted, and the papers have never heard of you except when they want to stir up fake rows with JKR. Then you get a little brain disease, and suddenly…

The secrets of the brain. Surgery. AWESOME. The brain is so beautiful.

Brain's counting skill 'built-in'

Police dog saves thief from river

Antidepressants link to poor driving. Yet another reason I don't bother. (Others being that I wear contact lenses and am dyspraxic, and consider those to be two real dangers to the public should I ever get behind the wheel of a death machine.)

Firefighters in dramatic double pet rescue!!!

Yew cuttings used for chemotherapy drugs

Woot, victory! Check out the ending quote from someone who sounds like a despicable person: The Supreme Court's desire to promote the homosexual lifestyle at the risk of infringing upon the First Amendment right to free exercise of religion is what the public needs to learn about

Advocates for Faith and 'Freedom' huh? How about the freedom to impose your blind, irrational superstitions on others instead of resigning when it becomes clear you won't (not can't) do the job you're paid to do? Is that a good use of your constitutional rights? Yeah!

Because OMG, a lesbian somewhere is having a child! This prevents me eating bits of Jesus on Sundays and forces me to convert to Druze!!!!!!! Dear Xolotl, these wankers make me so angry.

Dramatic pictures of a woman artificially 'aged' to show what sunbeds do to you.

Worldwide battle for water (yeah, no kidding)

Monks' drinks business to develop

I'd advocate corporal punishment for this creep, but what'd be the point? Make 'im wear a pink shalwar for a week…

Islamic authorities in the Nigerian city of Bauchi have reportedly launched a crackdown on sex workers identified by the Red Cross in a census. But don't worry, they say they're only arresting them and inspecting them for HIV. Or something. Yep.

Picnics without plastic. I'd still point out that disposable anything isn't ideal. Making paper (etc) plates still uses resources. Personally I have no objection to people buying solidly-made plastic dishes (or any other tough, hygienic and safe material, of course), bringing them home and reusing them.

……

I only wish the penguin had been given a hereditary peerage.

Huskies and Japanese lunchbreak

Ohh, well done BBC, just heard of ReCAPTCHA there…

Haredim in Jerusalem

Legal battle over Watchmen film

Best.

How Ubisoft makes computer games (video). I have no idea why it shows the presenter and interviewee yapping instead of what's going on on the mocap person's screen. Perhaps he was surfing Wikipedia.

New research on octopus memory. If you remember nothing else, remember to swim slowly past eight arms that octopuses are wonderful.

Advert featuring a school uniform striptease ruled inappropriate. Good.

Dementia burden 'could break NHS'

Sing with me. Where can you get poisoned by insec-ti-cide?

Nurses to be rated on compassion. Oh yes, just what we need. More retarded targets. Goody gumdrops.

Sun-free garden for girl with xeroderma pigmentosum.

More on xeroderma pigmentosum. And more.

The Caribbean monk seal is extinct. WELL DONE, EVERYBODY!

Egyptian pharaoh's 'missing' pyramid found. Meanwhile, ancient typo discovered in Discovery's headline. (Or possibly that was AP's doing.)

How not to have an Olympic mascot nightmare: have a little dignity and don't make it hideous.

(I don't really see why every darn thing needs a brand/snappy name/mascot, but my antagonism towards advertising and marketing practices is well documented.)

Pets abandoned because owners' irresponsibility with their money extends to their dependents, to whom they have a legal duty of care but apparently nobody gives a stuff about that. Horrible people.

Alpacas killed in dog attack.

More mental maths in primary schools (video)

50th anniversary of first computer to play music. (audio) Sorry about the choice of tracks. *wince*

Cardboard bike unveiled (video). Again, apologies for horrible patronising presenter and vox pops.

Bee species outnumber mammals and birds combined. Boggling. Yay!