I'm not kidding. Nearly all the interesting stories today have been either positive or... ah, well, quite silly.

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Trickle-down punishment? Poll's words are ringing sensible there. Grass-roots upward indeed; let our overpaid golden yobs get away with being disgusting, more like.

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So if you want to see the Norfolk Broads someday, better hurry up.

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Wallace and Gromit return to TV. This is fantastic news, marred a little by the presence of an obligatory luv interest. (Luv interests are sometimes fine; I specifically object to them being obligatory.)

In pictures: Wallace and Gromit sketches

[video] Nick Park! And mindlessly nodding interviewer.

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Carvings fun!

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Blazer on fire in pupils' protest

Huh... I deliberately chose to go to a secondary school that had uniforms, including in the sixth form, because the alternative is too awful to contemplate. Dog and pony fashion show, with all the spoiled brats being even more insufferable. Not to mention, what would I wear? Trousers, skirt, kilt? Overalls? Dungarees? (No.)

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Japanese bullet train on display (but we don't have a picture of it, instead some lady wearing pink sitting in the driver's seat).

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Elderly woman dies in bull attack

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Banksy or copycat? Either way, gigglesome. His art is great.

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Sculpture based on chaos theory

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Muslim group publishes an open letter to Osama Bin Laden.

Here's the letter.

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Those mouthy kids what sang on Another Brick in the Wall, Part 2. I always thought their bolshiness and sarf Londonness sounded a little put on, myself...

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Attempt to save ancient orchards

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Tasker Watkins is dead --- hang on, Alex is dead? That's awful! Why wasn't decent coverage given to that?

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Profile: Sergei Korolev

Q&A: Sputnik

I didn't really know the first thing about Le Sput, so - cool. And hurrah IGY, about which I read a minimal amount while writing Slen's birthday present.

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Scans reveal lost gravestone text. That really is impressive.

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Ah, eccentric sportspeople, how you fascinate us Brits.

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Turkey paternalistic bollocks. I like this not one bit. Oh sure, the Islamist PM is fine, he won't be that bad...

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NOT a good story for cat lovers. The sort of thing that gives me a raging vigilante-on.

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Duck-billed dinosaur had big bite

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Eggs and a banana? Unusual...

Anyway, the Buddhists are awarded another sanity point for apparently not kicking off too much. Your homework, if you're interested, is to find a full view of the statue rather than the BBC's genteelly (note spelling) cropped version. (The video clip verges on the ridiculous, with a woman artfully blocking certain areas with a water glass. Grow up, BBC.)

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Cows on the line!

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[video] Angry peacocks for any Farm Boys among my readers.

(Ah, Britain. Gratuitous Beatles and everything.)

(Ahh, BBC local news. One or two incidental facts to be found somewhere in the report, but mainly fluff, padding, lame humour and on-the-spottishness. I'd like to know, for example, if all the birds are male. Looks like it. Can you get 'bachelor herds' of pheasants? Where did these escape from? They must surely've been kept by humints before.)