Black Dog Blog

Archive for December, 2007

Squee, my Xmas pressies arrived! I now have Explore Phantom Black Dogs by Bob Trubshaw, upon which I've been perving in the virtual shop windows for ages. Hellhounds ROCK. So hard. *hugs it* This is a slim volume, sparsely illustrated, but it does have the woodcut from A straunge and terrible wunder in Bongay, plus pics of the Blythburgh church door (of The Darkness fame, among others) and Bungay weathervane, the obligatory quote from Robert Johnson, a list of sightings by year and even a list of motifs (at crossroads, wearing chains, leaving no footprints, etc). Did I mention I love spectral black dogs? WOOF!

Slen also got me Spider-Man 3, which I never got round to seeing in the cine (you wait ages for your brothers to come along and see it with you, and then they say "oh, I saw it the other day with so-and-so"…). And Science of Discworld III: Darwin's Watch — which I don't remember asking for, but will probably be good, judging by the second one.

New Iain M Banks out soon. Squeeeeee.

Some friends of Slen's (and mine, to a lesser extent) from secondary school are coming round this evening. I get to entertain them for an hour before Slen gets home from work. *twitch* (Probably fine; if nothing else, we've got a ton of new DVDs to watch.) So I shall go and bathe and put some laundry on and generally stop sitting around in a dressing gown playing Neopets and happily contemplating my roleplay partners and injokes about mages in wet shirts.

Mum's away at a friend's house in the Lakes for New Year. For those of you I don't see later this evening, since oddly enough I have nothing in particular planned in the way of wild parties, have a good one and stay safe on the roads.

New Year's resolution #1: Make more puns.

Also, if time, endeavour to be as awesome as Ree.

Mutt: Snog just accused me of making puns. *g*
Ree: Who, you? *g*
Mutt: Though I can't think of an intentional one I've made in quite some time, so gods only know what I've been doing unintentionally.
Ree: That's punpossible.
Mutt: Mwaha.
Ree: I try.
Mutt: Oh, except Rige's little skit on "meet", does that count? Maybe.
Ree: That was awesome though.
Mutt: Right, new resolution: must make more puns.
Ree: All for pun and puns for all!
Mutt: No it was vile vile and reprehensible don't encourage him.
Ree: Would you then have to react pun-itively?
Mutt: I'd mete out punimaginable doom?
Ree: Would I be pun-ished a-pun such a-pun-pearance?
***Mutt is sniggering too much to respund.
Ree: You'd take your pun-d of flesh then?
Ree: I think I would react in fear and take off punning, then.
Mutt: Methinks you already have…
Ree: These are horrible. I should sus-pun-d this at puns.
Ree: Or do you find them spundiferous and punderful?
Mutt: Pun my souls, is this punounced puntification punstoppable?
Ree: Apunt'ly not.
Mutt: (But others sharing my head are screaming for mercy in nineteen languages.)
Ree: … yeah, I might be out. Damn.
Ree: Punbelievable.
Mutt: The well has pun dry.
Ree: We'll have to suspund operations.
Ree: Punder new oppuntunities.

With minor edits for clarity, typos. (I didn't even notice "oppuntunities" until posting this.)

It went fine. Not even any arguments. I'm as dazed as normal. The tremor has been a serious problem, but thankfully nobody poked fun at it so I wasn't too distressed about it all.

When all my presents arrive, I expect I'll have a great few-days-after-Xmas. ;) Haul so far: jigsaw, film I haven't heard of that looks good, and a George W Bushisms calendar, all from Paul. (Thanks, bro, but I may have to give that last to mum. I'm scared of his face. x) Also arrived in time: the shiny new 250GB WD Passport drive I asked for from mum. Say "hurrah" with me, children. They're very nice beasts. Small and trendy and all — but more importantly, reliable (in my experience), virtually silent, pretty good rpm and powered by the USB bus. We have a couple of 120GB ones at work, which I use for taking backups three times a week.

I also have the DVD of the BBC's Jekyll series from this year, which I missed completely when it was on tv but heard was quite good. And Stephen Fry's book The Ode Less Travelled. If anyone can inspire me to write more doggerel it's Stephen, so you know whom to blame if I overcome my latest wave of self-revulsion (which *looks it up* started around May this year, good grief) and start spamming you all with "There was a young Schnauzer from Leeds…".

I gave: Where the Wild Things Are and other Sendak stories on DVD (for mum, who has an appropriately awe-stricken opinion of that 1963 children's book), red metal bird feeder with butterflies on it (for mum, who liked it. Shut up, I give what I think people will like, not what I like), tiny Chinese-style jewellery box (mum obviously, ditto), various katt food and treats (Piper, but he labelled them to mum when he very skilfully wrapped them), a share in the stuff Mum bought from Amazon for Slen ('cause she bought up his entire wishlist so I didn't have anything to get him). He had no surprises, because I'm just not that with it this year, but it was exactly what he wanted, and we're all grownups so I'm happy with that even if it's not 'magical'. He's already listened to Aurora Consurgens (Angra) and the new Sum 41. I wanted the Sum 41 too, so it will be spirited away and ripped very shortly. Slen says he gets the feeling they don't like Dubya very much. I also can't wait to kidnap and read The Escapement, the third in the Engineer series by K.J. Parker, because Parker = mastercraftsmanship of sadistic+intricate+geeky = luv.

For Paul, I bought the Happy Tree Friends complete DVD (oh yes — I went there) and some film called Premonition that looked like exactly the sort of plot Paul likes, and, so Slen tells me, has the guy who played Cole in it. Also some hammy treats for the gerbils (actually the fruit ones were labelled for rabbits, but the ingredients looked fine). I gave Paul another present that's for his birthday in late January, because I don't know if he'll be back over in Ireland then. That one's a very good one. Oh yes, he'll like that one. Some chance Wikipedia-browsing earlier in the year paid dividends. And I have some gifts for the dad, which I won't post about here because he hasn't opened them yet.

Planning to buy myself: behemoth computer, probably going by Ars Technica's list of recommended bits. (Randomly, things that make me qualifiedly happy today: one two.) Also considering an Empire Builder messenger bag, or its smaller sibling, because my backpack's wearing out and a fellow geek praised Tom Bihn bags to the skies in a related discussion earlier this year. I'm also still eyeing the XO laptops that keep turning up on eBay. Glorified gaudy e-book reader do want.

Nobody got me a tortoise. Which is probably just as well.

It's been a last-minute dash, which should have been stressful, but all I can feel beneath my usual confused ambience is calm, possibly even cheerful. This is probably because, having eschewed all television for a few months (mostly by chance and because I haven't the patience), I haven't been subjected to any Christmas specials or reruns of old films one is supposed to sit through because It's A Classic. 'S great!

Wrapping still to do – I waited for Slen to come home from work so we could do it together, but he's sleeping now. (The wine shop got completely bombarded, unsurprisingly, so he's tired.) I haven't got all that many things to wrap, because various people either said "don't get me anything" or didn't tell me what they wanted. Last year I was Super Reading-People's-Minds Man, but this year I knew I wouldn't be able to do that. Some of the stuff we ordered from Amazon.co.uk hasn't arrived. Slen can't remember if the option he paid for included guaranteed delivery; if so, he could complain, but I doubt he'll bother. I'm not bothered about getting my spectral black dogs book late.

Dad hasn't been in touch, despite apparently having arranged with Slen that one of them would contact the other about plans for Christmas day. Consequently I don't know WHAT either of them thinks is happening tomorrow. It'll be especially stupid if he's got food for us under the impression we'll be visiting. (He hasn't been given that impression at any point, mind — quite the opposite — but dad often assumes things will happen and sits around waiting for them to do so.) I wanted to invite him here this year, but he didn't make contact so it's too late now. And yes, there's a reason I haven't contacted him.

The weather varies between frosty, wet and our favourite 'wet on top of black ice'. I haven't been to see Northern Lights yet because no bastards'll go with me and I'm scared of braving the crowds alone. Maybe I'll take myself on or after Boxing Day. Also, proving stupidity is the greater part of bravery, Slen and I went to the supermarket earlier today. Yes, it was vultured. No bread left at all. Very many humans, including ambushes of screaming children — but once we reached the checkouts they were completely clear. Woot.

Stuck in my head, in defiance of all probability and sanity, is last year's German Eurovision entry. Yes, the yeehaw one. Drives me mad because the words don't parse correctly…

What else… tremor's been back with a vengeance from time to time. I've got my appointment for my brain scan on the evening of the 4th of Jan. I'm sure they won't find anything. ;)

I'd write a review of the year or something equally pants, but I honestly don't remember any of it. XD

Happy Christmas (which I maintain is a secular celebration) and religious festival of your choice!

Got out of work early (yay!) and took the chance to do some last-minute shopping. I now have stuff for the brothers and another person. Bought myself a cheap-ass jacket, too. Then stood in a queue to return it because the zip was bust and got a cheaper, not-as-badass one.

May be going to the cine tomorrow. I have to see Golden Compass Northern Lights, because watered down or not, Hollywoodised or not, it's one of my favourite books in existence and I need to see what they've done with it. And *mumbles* I sorta want to see St Trinians.

So anyway. Last day of work tomorrow before hols. We have to stay the full day because something's coming in at 15:00 (if they behave themselves – otherwise it could be later!), which is why we all sloped off early today.

Hmm. I was organised last December. This year, not so much.

Been generally krank. Just the usual tiredness and brainfog. It's a bit scary to think how much less on-the-ball I am and how much my memory's degraded, so I don't think about it. Tremor hasn't been bothering me nearly so much – although it's still there. Word-finding difficulties getting worse. I'm having them at work as well as at home; normally I can limit my symptoms when talking to what my brain considers strangers, but not so well today.

As always, the word's on the tip of my tongue; I can see the shape of it. But as soon as I try to say it the resistance tends to infinity, forcing me to paraphrase or stop stone cold. This can happen with any key word in a sentence. It becomes more likely if I have to repeat the word.

Slen mocks me because I default to using the word "make" when I can't find a verb. :( (Suitov says not to worry and it's endearingly Germanic, or something.)

Oh, pshaw, this is boring. Sadly I have nothing else to say that isn't whiny either. Wushu went kinda okay last night. By this I mean I only screwed up once… and a couple of other times, and then took myself off to one side to practice the two crappy easy kicks that still eluded (and elude) my stupid dyspraxic self and let everyone else get on with things. Also, I'm scared of swords, and the staves make a loud noise that makes me panic. Don't worry, though, because I'll likely never be good enough to start weapon stuff.

And I'm having a minor spazz about my writing. Read the rest of this entry »

I saw this headline and thought "Oh dash, necromancers!" Epic fail. :D

McLaren admission ends F1 spy row

Banksy claims over wall graffiti

SHUT UP! Stop using the phrase "holy row"! You should be sacked! *eyelidtwitch*

The church can shut up too. It's ONE light. And nobody pretends December is an exclusively Christian thing any more. They're only 'Christmas lights' by tradition – they're allowed to be enjoyed everyone with light festivals around now or anyone who fancies cheering up at this time of year.

Crown to appeal stripper ruling

I don't get it. Why wouldn't you analyse the spray? (Given that you're investigating this strippogram at all, which seems silly.) Surely the spray's extremely pertinent – if it's harmless, it's not an offensive weapon! Oh well – I suppose that was the judge's point.

Did you know? Britain – and not the United States – is the "pioneer of liberty for the modern world".

Values such as liberty, civic duty and social responsibility [are] "uniquely" British.

Freedom! Frrrreedom! I like how that tastes. Well, I'm glad we in Britain love freedom so much – I can't understand why everyone else in the world hates it. I guess you're all mean. :'(

Mumbai arrests over flamingo hunt

Just as well I came in today, because nobody else did. We're a sickly lot (or our offspring is, in some cases).

*wheeze, feeble cough, bloodshot eyeroll, etc*

I may dodge out after I've done the essentials. Luckily there's not all that much to do. I managed to get two regular Friday chores done yesterday. I do need to take a backup, though, because nobody did that while I was gone.

Still wheezy and unnerving my colleagues a little bit with my sporadic fits of failure to cough. It's annoying. I'm not ill enough not to turn up, but I don't like hanging around being mildly off-colour at people. There's the rudeness inherent in saying "hey, I'm risking infecting you because I'm that inconsiderate", and also the fact that my employer is not getting my best. I know my brain's running significantly below capacity. (But, then, I can say that of the last few years. No word from the neurologist, by the way.)

Well, turns out nobody's been frauding my, er, fraudy thing after all, which is good. Unfortunately it took an hour on the phone to the bank this morning to find this out, and if they'd told me in the first place that it was a couple of failed ATM withdrawals, instead of describing the suspicious activity as "payments" (which I assumed to be successful ones), I'd have known what was going on. Namely, my not knowing the exchange rate accurately and bumping into my withdrawal limit when trying to pay the medicos in cash. Which was exacerbated by unhelpful error messages from the aforementioned machines. "That's over your limit" would have been helpful. "Me, withdraw cash? That's unpossible!" wasn't.

Tonight we party. My +1 is my brother. How pathetic am I? Pathetic like a FOX, that's how! We may sneak off early, depending how excruciating I find the situation. Ah for a ready-made excuse unassailable under the Disability Discrimination Act. I bet you're all jealous.

Specifically, polyamory as a 'solution' to asexuality. There's an interesting discussion on the asexuality community on LiveJournal.

Note: I've nothing against the concept but I don't think it's likely to work. In the linked discussion I say so very bluntly. If you're going to feel flamed, don't bother reading – I doubt I'm making any new points. If you're going to flame, I'll yawn.

Thread with me, another person with interesting perspective and the OP

Original post with all comments

edit, 13/12: Evidently I should post about HAWT GROUP SEX more often. Look at all the discussion it's generated on the LJ mirror.

Home, coughing up genteel amounts of material from my lungs, wheezy, voice unreliable, therefore am in work (of course).

So, I need to get onto the bank about the card fraud, and also buy a suit or something for a coworker's graduation party tomorrow. Maybe it's my breathless chesty voice, but I made a crack to Slen earlier about him cosplaying the Tenth Doctor (the party-giver is a fan) and he took me seriously and started berating me for not warning him it was fancy dress (as I told him, it isn't; smart casual, but with a request for glitter, which I'll probably creatively interpret as "wear a silver tie").

Just realised where Beak-Man's Oxford don robes must have come from. Ah, my predictable brain. Throughout last week I found myself tweaking the workings of Weft's species' teeth, with hilarious consequences resigned amusement.

(Weft is such a whiner. For zee record, I had absolutely no intention for him to reveal that information then. He decided to spill of his own accord, sometime in the day or so leading up to my post there. Normally my characters don't surprise me, but I raised an eyebrow.)

Oh, speaking of kitties, Piper was unpurrturbed to see me back. His exact words: "Oh, hey, good to see milk again. Milk. I see it in the fridge. Give it to me." Prof. Mousington and Filibuster, the kittens from across the road, turned up immediately to see me. Slen says they haven't been seen all last week. I are touched. Poor Filib has somehow acquired some injuries on the side of his head, but that didn't stop him following us inside and playing with Piper in their dysfunctional way.

If anyone's interested, I looked through the dentist's bill and my mum compared it to English prices. They charged me £500ish at her special family rate (she's helping them with their business), so it should have been £560(?). In England, from our former family dentist (who's relatively good) the same treatment would have cost from £3000+, been done to a lower standard with old-fashioned equipment — you bet your damn dentures there wouldn't have been an endoscope, I'd have lost the tooth — and he would have spent a fraction of the time on me. Oh, and the flights were only £40ish total. Crazed. I'm not really keen on principle on the whole idea of dental tourism, but it's hard to argue with the numbers.

Wroclaw Zoo visit, handily organised for your interest.

Cerhn: Wolves! And some kind of ruddy wild dog from north-east Africa whose name I couldn't translate; I saw a bit of one, but they were understandably in their little house out of the cold, so no good views. Wolves were outdoors, anyway. It's a long time since I've succeeded in speaking dog, forget wild dog. I did manage to get one to come over, but couldn't think of anything to say, so she or he wandered off again.

Poet: Reptile house! Which was, uh, wasted on me, though I spent a lot of time in there going aww; I can pretty much tell a cobra from a not-cobra, but that's about my limit. The tortoises, however, were awesome. I want a Hermann's tortoise – not just because the name's funny, but they're pretty. Much nicer than those effete Indian star tortues, the pansies. Lots of crocs too, though the enclosures looked too small for several of them. It's possible they go outside when the weather's better; there were some empty wet enclosures outside.

Anyone who likes giraffes: Giraffe! It licked me. Quite a lot. I tried to look gracious.

Ree: Lion! He was making a tremendous fuss over something.

Me: Aquarium, notably some utterly awesome rays. I stared at them with a stupid grin for quite some time. They kept obliging by showing me their underparts. Eeeeeeeee. And some fish and stuff. Most of the gallery was closed for work, so I didn't see anything good except for… piranhas. \m/

Slen: Tigers! Comprising two white tigies as well as a (male) Amur tiger in a neighbouring enclosure. I took photos with Slen's mobile phone, having (GRR) no working camera. The Amur deigned to spray the plexiglass near where I was standing. Charming. The female white came over and ate grass at me. Considering the limits of the old Nokia, I got some GREAT close-ups. And ran out of photo room. Picture a grumpy mutt slumped in front of the tiger glass (with a big Auric lying on the other side – we would have been touching if the glass hadn't been there) desperately trying to work out which pictures of the damn cat Slen wouldn't mind deleting for the sake of toothy tigie smiles.

Me: Lynx! About the only cats I really like, these guys were very unbothered by my pidgin Domestic Cat (smile, blink, rinse, repeat), though they kept a sharp eye on any keepers who happened to be driving past in their electric milk float things. Must have been nearly lynx lunchtime.

Me again: Serval! These things are great to watch. (I put one in Mews because they rawk.)

Anke: Owls! Not much to say about them, because I was more interested in the ramparts, so saw them all from above. Was generally ignored.

Snog: I looked for the fox, really looked, but there wasn't even the enclosure where the map said there was. (I BLAME YOU AND YOUR SPAWN FOR THIS.)

Humans and Pratchett fans: Chimps and orangutan! These guys were very unimpressed with me, and I can't blame them. I don't speak any chimp apart from knowing not to bare the top teeth. I had turned to leave before hitting on the inspired idea of brushing my teeth at them. I am not joking – both the orang and a lady chimp LOVED seeing this.

Ree: Puma! By this point I was tired and cold and unobserved, so I let it know what I think of it. (Mutt: "Wriaaaow! Yeooow!" Puma: "Yeah, whatever.")

Ungulate fans: Petting zoo! Everything bolted FAR away from me on first sight for some reason. I wasn't having this. You can become surprisingly popular with darling little lambikins, dear little nanny-goats (and a shy billy) and many a squealy baby pigu if you know how to extract half a carrot from behind someone's food trough and bribe people with bits of it.

Bear fans: Bears! The polar looked utterly bored. I liked the one (looking it up now, I think it was a spectacled bear) who came and stood in the moat and waved at me. The grizzlies, by contrast, were proceeding in a very suspicious manner around and around their enclosure, clearly planning evil. Or just bored out of their big bear skulls.

I didn't see ANY dogs today, which just goes to show… something or other.

Title lyric: intentional misquotation, When a Wooer Goes A-Wooing. Poor jester.

So I found out what the problem was with machines not liking my card, and surprise surprise, we have some fraudulent transactions! Wonderful, he said, with a curl of his dry, cracked bottom lip. The bank sensibly cancelled the card. I spoke to them today and do have enough cash, I hope, to last out the next two days.

Still, luverly.

Humans made me fighting mad for unrelated reasons today. I was conversing with some dogs outside the supermarket and they were bloody freezing to death. The shorthaired (forgot the breed, duh… knee height, terrier?) was shivering all over. Tied to a post and couldn't even move around. Unfortunately he or she was too shy for me to get in close and give her or him a good rub. The delightful white bull terrier next to him or her was a lot friendlier, and indeed I had to tell her off a couple of times for playing silly devils with my gloves. (I think she's chewed my frelling expensive headphone buds, too!) She was also incredibly loud and barky. At least she was moving (read: jumping madly) around, though. Then a little toy thing turned up and also started up a ruckus, but at that point I'd got through to the bank and learned the situation, so I left.

Sulked in the hostel bedroom for a couple of hours. Finished Aberystwyth 2 (still quite good, but doesn't have me engaged enough to play along with the spot-the-clue game. Either that or I read too fast) and read six chapters of Dragon. Had thoughts about Morrolan and Vlad that faintly disturbed and amused me.

No. Not slashy thoughts. Geez, you people.

I'm currently in an internet café. Because I really know how to live it up in Wroclaw on a Sunday night. Later on I'm actually going to cook myself something, shock horror surprise. It is not noticeably Vlad's influence, but more that I'm bored of things I don't have to cook, and I ate all my apples earlier, anyway.

Nothing to do tomorrow, so I guess I'll go to the zoo. Stupid camera charger. I'll try to remember more than my usual fug, so I can at least come back with exciting stories for you all about the tiger.

Fe'cita says hiiiiiiiiiiiii.

Highlight of the day was an unmutilated Weimaraner. Dogdamn those bastards are sexy. I think she knew it, too. What a sweetie. If only I had the guts to approach people while there's a human holding their leads, but I haven't.

Machines hate me today, especially ATMs. They have picked today, when I need to pay for my treatment in cash tomorrow, to decide cash withdrawal is an invalid transaction for my card type. I've been happily using cash machines all week. What is up with that, you crazy machines. >:(

I'm sitting here in the hostel's hallway at the shared computer, eating apples, brazil nuts, gouda and local delicacy gingerbready things. I am drinking what I thought was chocolate soy milk, but has turned out to be chocolate chip yoghurt drink. What is up with that, you crazy Poles. <3

Still reading Aberystwyth 2. Next it's Dragon, which is one of the Vlad books I remember enjoying least (except for Teckla), though I've no idea if I'll have a different view this time around.

Speaking of Teckla, it's not that the idea wasn't a good one. The socialist (or whatever it is!) theory colliding with a fantasy world in which The Gods really did Decree that these are the ruling classes, and they really ARE genetically different to the peasantry, is a great topic. But I don't remember it being gone into in any depth. I just remember lots of mushy stuff, which is convincing (unsurprisingly – the book was a pretty thin veneer for Brust's personal issues of the time) but ultimately mushy stuff still.

My mouth seems just about complete, with a scale and polish and the last amalgams vanquished today. Don't know what we might be doing tomorrow, apart from that I have to make a hole-in-the-wall machine obey my iron whim so I can pay these lovely laydees. Grr. I don't even know how many Polski shinies I can withdraw every day, so I don't know if I'll have enough. Woulda liked to find that out today instead of tomorrow. DAMN THE MACHIIIINE

Beautiful Boxer with real ears and tail (YAY!), some kind of bull terrier, some yappy spaniels and/or terriers (I was tired, can't remember), a drop-dead Alsatian puppy, adult Alsatian, a Yorkie (who walked underneath the bench on which I was sitting last night) and I can't remember the rest.

Someone wandered in on me doing my leet wushu stretches yesterday. Hostel LOL. At least I was fully clothed and not in a mood to be embarrassed by my lack of physical prowess. And they wandered out again before I started practising the kicks, so yay.

Kate says thanks for the baby stuff my mum sent her. She's been in hospital for a few days (I couldn't find out what for from Margaret, but apparently nothing serious; Kate's pregnant and apparently they wanted to keep her in for observation. Not NHS LOL) so I've been treated by Margaret until today. Kate is better, at least in terms of telling me what she's doing and not letting me get so much gunk in my lower mouth that I start thinking I'm choking.

The lower right quarter of my mouth is immune to anaesthetic. THANKS MOUTH. OW. (I suspect it'll be something to do with the inflamed bone and unhappy gum beneath the badly cracked tooth. This was pointed out by the specialist who did my endoscopic root fills: he advised me to get it x-rayed in six months' time to check it's gone down.) (Otherwise my gums are in fantastic nick, according to the other dentist I saw back in England…) I'm a wimp, but, I'm told, very patient.

What else? No more grand excursions yet. I spent the first part of today in the hostel reading. I was too exhausted from a night of interrupted sleep and feeling a little unwell. (I'll say this and no more. If you're subsisting on dried fruit and juice, the results will be predictable.) Will try to get to the zoo. My camera charger is completely fucked, though, so probably no pictures of the tiger. >:(

I wonder where this Xmas market is, then.

Currently drinking: Cactus juice. No, really, that is what it says on the carton. It does taste kinda like dragonfruit, I guess.

Currently stuck in head: Dave Nachmanoff, Cactus Juice, and honestly, is there anyone who couldn't see that one coming? But it is mixed in with Power Quest's Soul Fire for galaxies reasons unknown.

Read since last update: Two Vlad Taltos books, Taltos and Yendi; going for chronological order this time. Oh Cawti, you so nawti.

Currently reading: The second Aberystwyth book, Last Tango. What the Butler Saw LOL.

Currently hoping: That I won't end up with a thing for ladies in stovepipe hats. That really would be unhelpful.

"This pornographic film-related article is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by expanding it" Oh, Wikipedia.

xhstd.

But fine. Walking around all day, visiting dentists in the afternoon and looking at buildings in the morning. Now, don't get me wrong, I myself find buildings crushingly boring. All are alike to me, except churches and cathedrals, which I hate. However, I was told to get lots of photos because the architecture-nut parent forgot to take a camera when she was here, so I went some way towards obliging.

I assume I look like a wandering idiot whenever the camera's in my hand, because along with my characteristic ignorance of every other biped, I have been known to wander onto traffic islands¹ or spend twenty seconds taking little sidesteps in order to get the best angle. The same driving urge at one point found me down on one knee between parked cars trying to get low enough to snap a doorway with some carved head on it. The photos turn out crap anyway. Cameras don't see what my eyes do. I think the battery in Argus² is fucked, because I'm getting very little life from full-blobs chargedness to turning-itself-off powerlessness. Argus's flash remains utter crap, as always, and goes off at the most hilariously inappropriate moments.

While I remember, today's count: at least one Golden, boxer with cropped ears (boo), some kind of black herder/Dobie/something-or-other with docked tail (boo), Rottie in muzzle tied up outside a shop, three huskies also muzzled with one unknown sled-dog-looking breed without, a Yorkie, some kind of white thing, several wandering random encounters of who knows what breed, and maybe some others I've forgotten.

Read so far: Aberysthwyth Mon Amour, which I would have consented to read a damn sight sooner if Slen had told me it was hard-boiled surrealism. It was reasonably good. I read so fast I missed details and description.

Treated so far: two quarters of mouth, half of the badly cracked root fill tooth. Numb this evening: bottom right, top left.

Eyes closing, so going to bed.

¹ Retaining the presence of mind to wait for the crossing light to go green, of course, because I have a conservative view of the amount of suffering appropriate to any category of art.
² Most unoriginal name for a(n Olympus) camera ever. Except perhaps for Snappy. I've never had one called Snappy.

Slen, or mum, contact me if my eBay item arrives. (I'm ashamed to say it's more Weft-crack. (IT WAS CHEAP))

You may all hear less of me for a week while I'm over in Wroclaw (pron. "vrot suave"), so what should I leave you to remember me by? Some groovy doggerel? A carefully thought-out bit of ranting, er, commentary, about some idiocy in the news? Nah, have a YouTube vid, a few edumacational facts and a bunch of dumbass injokes.

WIN. Win for justice. Win for Zorro!

An amarant(h) is an imaginary flower that never dies, a genus of real plants (notably including love-lies-bleeding, a name I've always liked) or a particularly boring colour of reddish purple beloved by silk-loving pansy monks who won't shut up with their silly plot ideas.

More amusingly, amaranth dye is better known as the famous Red Dye #2, which raises a chuckle from this Monkey Island child.

P.S. LEEROY OLZON – for all your never-fading raidin'! Prepare to be pwned by cutthroat Finns and death-or-glory Swedes!
P.P.S. That flower is OVER 9000!
P.P.P.S. Piracy, Helmine, you know it makes sense.