Black Dog Blog

Archive for May, 2009

Kat got me this album for my birthday earlier this month. (Thanks, Kat!) My thoughts after 1.67 listens:

I like it loads!

This album is heavy on the fire and explosions. It's not a peaceful album. Not that I'm sure what you were expecting from 30–40-year-old punk rockers, but they're very much not mellowing out.

There's the usual Green Day playfulness to the lyrics ("She smashed her knuckles into winter / as autumn's wind fades into black / She is the saint on all the sinners / the one that's fallen through the cracks", "Join the choir, we will be singing / in the church of wishful thinking", "She puts her makeup on / like graffiti on the walls of the heartland", and "Little girl, little girl you're such a liar / you're just a junkie preaching to the choir"), along with a few duff rhymes (fire/desire, killjoy/Detroit) and a few awesome ones (vendetta/Beretta).

I shouldn't like Peacemaker, but I really really do.

You get a nice fat booklet with all the lyrics in (Green Day are always great for that, even if their proofreading has been a little slack on previous albums), and the album art is a great Banksy/graffiti style.

Overall, as a piece of music, I rate this higher than American Idiot, particularly because there isn't a single crap track on this one. Least favourite, I suppose, is Know Your Enemy, which I found silly and repetitive when I first heard it, but in fact after three listens I don't mind it.

Here's a song from the album, ¡Viva la Gloria!. Listen past 1:05 or you won't get the full experience.

Read the rest of this entry »

Well, it's official, I never ever want to grow a heart…

…But one situation right now is awfully cute, and I'm happy for those involved.

(Enigmatic post, because it's none of our business really.)

"…send me the power to bring them to their knees."

Is it more expected for females to use their sexuality to succeed, than it is for males to do the same?

Is it more acceptable?

118 118 man seen in Marmite

It may not be immediately obvious to everyone, but one family is convinced they can see the mascot of a directory enquiry service on the lid of a jar of Marmite.

Claire Allen, 36, said she was the first to notice the image on the underside of the lid as she was putting the yeast spread on her son's toast.

Her husband Gareth, 37, said he could not believe his eyes when he saw it.

Mr Allen, of Ystrad, Rhondda, said: "The kids are still eating it, but we kept the lid."

He explained: "Claire saw it first and called her dad to come and take a photo of it.

"When I first looked at it I wasn't sure, but when I moved it away from me it started coming out. I thought yeah, she's right – that's the moustache bloke from the adverts.

Mrs Allen told the South Wales Echo: "Straight away Jamie said "that looks like 118", and my other boys (Robbie, four, and Tomas, 11) even said they could see a face.

"People might think I'm nuts, but I like to think it's 118 118 looking out for us.

"We've had a tough couple of months; my mum's been really ill and it's comforting to think that the jogging man from a commercial directory enquiries company advert is watching over us."

Read the original story here. Doesn't make much more sense than my parody, does it?

So I've been was agonising with colleagues about how this was ever considered to be 'news' within the BBC's remit to inform (no), educate (…no) and entertain (?).

Other text services are available, including AQA, which has sexy goffboi harlots working for it.

And now it's time for….

Psalm or Marmite advert?

Marmite advertisements use the attention-grabbing tactic of claiming you may hate their product.

But are the following quotations prophecies from the psalms associated with Jesus, or adverts for the goopy black stuff? You decide!!!!

1. "More in number than the hairs of my head are those who hate me without cause"
2. "You either love it or hate it"
3. "All who hate me whisper together against me"

Marmite's next campaign: "For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man's foes shall be they of his own household. Some of whom will eat peanut butter. Shun them. Shun them."

I feel sympathy for Anke's hurt at all the crap the media would have us believe about female humans.

Without in any way implying the problem of females in the media is in any sense at all the same as that of males (yawn), it kinda puts me in mind of my Friday evening.

Which I actually spent playing pool in the bar with the guys from work. Yeah, seriously.

Well, one very rusty game and then I confined myself to cheering and heckling, because I can't remember if I'm left or right handed, but still. Fun.

I don't fit in with male people very well. I can yap about work and interesting things I read on the internet, but I don't feel like one of the guys. I'm standing with them in a shirt and slacks, not sitting with the skirt-wearers, but I'm drinking soft drinks instead of beer, and once the conversation turns to football, I start looking over my shoulder for an out. On this occasion I wandered off and got talking for a minute to a couple of other male colleagues, who remarked "Yeah, I think football is just a sort of safe topic for guys." Interesting way to think about it.

The thing is, while this was going on, the girls were passing round Heat Magazine and talking about boys — and that I consider a far worse waste of my time than listening to how Giggs is or isn't in the top ten players of all time.

No. The real thing is, I can fit in with more ease with females. I think women are just more accepting. I don't feel the same pressure to be 'one of the girls' that I do, around males, to be 'one of the lads'.

It's all in my head, anyway; if I didn't want to pretend I fit in for a little while, I wouldn't feel like a failure.

Anyway, for a while this all got me thinking a little unhappily about the whole beer and football thing that you seem to have to do if you want to be a proper bloke. Find the right males and you can substitute other things for beer and football, like Linux, Triumph Stags, bench presses or Quake, but… I don't know. I still feel the same pressure to prove myself. And ultimately, I can't. I don't care about anything normal people care about. Or are meant to care about. And my trigger finger reflex is shite, and I prefer Oblivion or Dungeon Keeper.

I guess that the media image of men is more of an exaggerated depiction, whereas the female… well, I've never been a proper woman either, so I wouldn't know. I wouldn't want to be the ideal media man. I'd just like to be the ideal media woman even less.

And now, a tiger.

A happy little tale about monks and collapsed buildings. Contains injury.

Gentle feedback welcomed as ever.

edit:
"evil" –Kat
"dark" –Jenny
"Love it" –Vespers
"badass kitty" –Anke
"tasty goodness" –Ree
Thanks guys, I really appreciate it.

WTF! WTF! WTF! WTF! WTF! WTF! WTF! WTF!

Nooo, Watson, I'll protect you from the nasty Madonna-toyboy.

Certain brain areas could be linked to sociability, or so a study suggests.

I don't see how a study on just 41 people could possibly be valuable.

Go ahead, speculate that autistics' brains are underdeveloped, that's fiiiiiiiine. Just don't impugn our taste for chocolate, please.

edit: Good dog.

http://religioustattoos.net/

runs the gamut from

"How could hell be worse than going around with that on you for the rest of your life?"

all the way to

"Hey, that would be quite nice if it wasn't carved into someone's flesh."

Enjoy.

(Old news, actually, but I've only just come across it.)

Condom condom condom condom

At a wedding!

And no, the post tags are not lying. This was made by the WST. Now that's awesome.

Meme ganked from Narcissima and tweaked:

If you had to liken me to one or two characters (of whatever sex, species and so on) from any comic, movie, TV show, book and so on – who would it be, and why?

Finland's Euroviz entry has me wanting to go on another E-Type binge. <3 E-Type.

If Sweden could sing properly in her normal voice, I would've wanted her to win, but she sounded very weak (worse in the final performance, not the one linked; I'd say her operatic voice sounded better in the final, though). <3 Sweden anyway; always guaranteed for a great show.

Full marks to the BBC for their subtitle and red button coverage, as you'd expect from a compulsive viewer of subtitles. Although I did spot a few errors… ;)

And Norton, well, I'm happy to be proved wrong. He was good! Maybe it was knowing that most of his audience are gay or gay-friendly, so he doesn't try so hard with the "lol camp dicks omg p00fz0rs" stuff, or maybe he was trying to emulate Wogan, but he gave a great commentary, funny and biting while maintaining a semblance of dignity. Until the voting, because he actually seemed to care if we won. lol.

Booya, Daily Wail. Pwned.

The owner of our cat has been away overnight.

As often happens, said cat left her a note this morning before I left for work, to complain that he had been cruelly neglected and mistreated, not fed and made to sleep in a ditch ("and knott on lapp or HeRMunz BEDD (lies)!!").

In actual fact we spent a quiet evening rewatching Dexter episodes. However, immediately after he placed his note, I let him outside to pee in a rain shower, thus helpfully ensuring that his pyperbole was justified after the fact.

The best-received note of complaint was a few weeks ago. In it, he claimed he had been insulted by having a pill jammed down his "skrawnee NEKk" and said he was going outside to sit under his tree "in high DUDJIN!!!!".

Cats aren't people, which must be why it's so much fun personifying the ungrateful little bastards.

The Inspiration

Awesomeness here via Almostwitty: Fiddling contrast gives you sex!

I guess it sort of makes sense – darker lips look quite female?

The Plan

1. set up shop offering Sex Change While-U-Wait
2. fiddle contrast on before and after photos
3. ???????
4. profit

Hey! Ha ha!

Look what voodoo-vibe posted! (Apologies to AW who'll see this twice…)

HA HA HA HA HA.

Frerene was the only woman in the world.

The continuing adventures of Dork Boy and Panty.

I'd written half a post, sat on it for getting on for a week, and finally decided I should post it rather than waiting for the rest to occur. I still don't know where I'm going to finish this.

Neat Star Trek gallery on Wired, featuring Kirk cuddling some Tribbles. Much as I enjoyed the new film, I approve of their commentary's acidic tone as they point out some of its silly Hollywoodisms. (The "fresh-faced rookies" thing was irritating. Only characters over… eh, 35ish, bare minimum, are entitled to be awesome.)