Black Dog Blog

Archive for the ‘web’ Category

BBC is facing 'moment of realism', warns Mark Thompson

Longest pizza record attempt in Poland

Tiger cub found among stuffed toys in Bangkok luggage

Get out from there, tiger. You are not a cuddly toy, you are a tiger.

Police issue warning after Highland big cat sightings

It's impossible to get enough octopodes. Talented octopus dupes predators by impersonating fish

South Sudan to end use of child soldiers

Scarf of Hope to remember Peru's missing

Mexico's Catholic Church fans flames of gay rights row

The strange virtual world of 4chan

I don't have an actual wooden spoon in my immediate possession, but kindly imagine me slapping one contemplatively against my palm in anticipation of the first person here to go "RULE ONE AND TWO!!2!".

Crack found in World Cup!

African-American women struggle to overcome wealth gap

Meanwhile, UN to set up agency promoting women's rights. I hope the 'gender' part of the title doesn't apply only to women. We should always aim for no discrimination based on gender, not 'gender equality' between the two mainstream groups.

Pretty ship at Tower Bridge

'Big budget' porn film shot in London hospital. Yes, apparently the offence is mainly over the fact that the film's budget was higher than the NHS's. Ditto occupational health standards. Zing.

Taiwan chocolate art exhibition. That 'jade' cabbage is beautiful. And the dice and mahjongg pieces, so cute! Exit through the gift shop… NOM.

Fluffy ostrich

Close encounters with giant harpy eagle of Venezuela, who very effectively sorts out a nasty ape that is trying to climb towards her nest. In the second clip, another young man stares out a different filthy ape and takes the mickey out of its walkie-talkie.

Meanwhile, webcam viewers freak out over human hands appearing in their shot of an osprey nest.

Respect is due to this badass lady, who chose to remain conscious during an operation to remove a tumour from her brain.

Dangerous dogs bill 'does not go far enough'. I disagree with the criticisms in the main…

Changes proposed include more emphasis on the owners' responsibility, attacks which take place on private property becoming a criminal offence, and legislation no longer being breed specific.

I don't fully understand the part about attacks occurring on private property (the interview clip seemed to suggest the opposite of what I understood from the article, and I haven't bothered to look up the details yet), but as for the other two changes mentioned, they're completely sensible. A person's race is never an excuse for criminal activity; childhood abuse and upbringing, on the other hand, certainly do shift the blame onto the family. Besides, you can't end up with a situation where you're forced towards genetically testing a litter of crossbreeds, and even ending up with brothers and sisters coming under different laws because of the exact proportion of Staffie in their blood.

The Bahá'ís just can't seem to catch a break. It looks likely that those in Iran (where, I will point out, their religion originated, unlike Islam!) are due further terrorisation and mob violence with the silent collusion of Ahmadinnerjacket's jackboot cronies.

The coalition government is sticking with Labour's Equality Act, apart from the bit about forcing employers to make public how much less they pay their women employees than men.

Inequality just isn't going away. The gap in life expectancy between rich and poor is widening, and somehow I don't quite trust the Tories to close it, even with their collective arm twisted by the yellow contingent.

'Hidden obscenity': Older men grooming teens for sex

Signs of child sexual exploitation 'being missed'

Neil Gaiman (video) on comics and literary success…

"Do you think being a comic writer means you've not been taken seriously?" "I think that coming from a comics background has meant that I have never cared at all about being taken seriously. … I come from comics. That's not even the gutter: that's the drain that the gutter runs into."

Good Omens is still the best thing I've ever read from Gaiman. It was co-written with Terry Pratchett, with the result that both loopy writers bounced off each other magnificently, to glorious results. (The worldbuilding in American Gods and Anansi Boys was enjoyable too, but only because Pratchett's Small Gods – which, unlike Gaiman's books, I can find really scary – had burrowed into my brain during a formative stage.)

I never knew Gaiman's family members were Scientologists. That must help with horror writing.

Speaking of living in a controlled environment, how do you fancy life in a village where children are banned?

Threecows!

30% of children feel scared when they see adults drunk or drinking too much, – which I suppose makes me 30% child, because I know drinkers terrify me. I'm more disturbed by the proportion of children ("nearly half") for whom drinking to excess is a normal, non-frightening sight.

I'll cheerfully admit that I don't know who Justin Bieber is, but 4chan has sent him off to North Korea. Well done, /b/uddies. Can he stay there?

Ouch! What's that pain in my horn fingers? Ah, it's my chronic Finnophilia flaring up again.

Finland makes broadband a 'legal right'

(Only 1Mbps, I know – but you should bear in mind, if you live in a fortunate area, that over a quarter of the UK doesn't even have that.)

Three-legged dogs aid robot study

Specialist unit reports more male forced marriages

The Afghan women jailed for 'bad character'

South Korea professor charged over 'holy water' fraud.

Can they prove it was NOT holy water? Because I'm hoping there are no homeopaths walking free in South Korea.

The Child Exploitation Centre is apparently making cautionary cartoons about Paedobear. Er?

I'd like to see that cartoon shown on the page, but can't find it online. I did find this web safety film, which is excellent.

SIEGE POWER! Fifty-one brave souls sabotaged the drawbridge and held Red Castle from invading cherrypickers for three hours. This without any supplies of grapeshot, jelly shots, crossbow bolts or boiling oil. Bold defenders, we salute you!

Dog lifestyle study seeks 20,000 young Labradors

Wonder Woman gets trendy makeover. More from a source that actually understands comics:

DC Comics Has Ruined Wonder Woman!

To add insult to injury for WW fans, from that summary it sounds like a lame House of M style story. Oh well, I bet she gets un-rebooted at the end, making this (no pun intended) a non-issue.

A little Aussie town advises an American town on giving up bottled water.

If Australians can manage without imported purified water, there's hope for us all. It's a horrific product and I wish Concord, Massachusetts the best of luck in vanquishing the unethical companies that peddle it.

A grab bag of newsy scraps I snuffled up before and after the weekend:

Italy raises alarm over blue mozzarella

Typing is helping a boy with autism communicate. I'm dismayed that it took until he was nine. NINE? What were his teachers doing all that time? To think of him being trapped inside all that time and (reading between the lines of the article) being spoken to as if he was an idiot who didn't understand anything…

This isn't a win for this child. It's a late, very late mitigation of an epic fail.

More than three guide dogs a month 'attacked by dogs'

Truro pensioners' action call over seagull attacks

Water voles make a comeback in UK (i.e. Ratty! I was always Ratty whenever we read Wind in the Willows when I was little. This is because Ratty is fabulous. Seriously. Read the book.)

Plastic bags to be put over Birmingham 'terror cameras'

Senior Italian cardinal accused of corruption

He says he will co-operate with the investigation despite his immunity as a Vatican diplomatic passport holder.

I reckon he was very likely ordered to do as much, just so the unfairness of 'diplomatic immunity' granted by their silly little made-up state is kept well out of the discussion.

Tuesday, 13th June 1911: a Very Important episode from Scott's Antarctic diaries. Yes, there's a dog involved. FACT: If they'd used dogs instead of ponies (as Amundsen did), they would probably have survived and, who knows, perhaps even beaten Amundsen (but not likely, because he chose the better route too).

By the way, if you hadn't noticed (I think I've mentioned it before), they're publishing Scott's Antarctic diaries in 'real time' on the linked site. You can subscribe and follow their RSS feed.

And lastly, a puffin with noms.

Updates from my Twitter feed don't seem to be being crossposted here for some reason. I don't know why that could be yet.

As far as important updates blog readers may have missed, @cubicgarden is improving slowly and able to receive visitors.

also,

• I found out my brother can't touch-type. I feel a little dirty. Like he's a racist or something. Today on Trisha: "My 20WPM family shame!" #
• #vss Sam was born immune to HIV. He never entered a hospital and he died with the cure in his blood undiscovered. Sam was an Amazonian frog. #
• It's very sad when I glance at the breaking news feed and go "oh, another deadly mosque attack in Lahore". Get yourself together, world! #
• On the BBC in 1977: "What Right Have You Got? A 26-part course on rights and responsibilities of the citizen". Why no stuff like that now? #
• Say my name! http://bit.ly/dlFkvD Great mashup from DJ Earworm #
• #channelingbeyonc © Boy, the way you blowin' up my phone won't make me leave no faster, put my coat on faster, leave my desk no faster. #
• I wouldn't hate society so much if a ringing phone was considered "would you like to speak?" instead of "you must speak or you are rude!!!" #
• Thanks to @CustardCat for the #ff a chap who can make Arduinos do things you thought were illegal in your home state. And also play radio. #
• I can't be bothered to do a proper list, so just #ff whomever I seem to reply to a lot, especially if their avatars are animals. #
• Hmm. I could either catch up on the #Eurovision semis (songs only, CBA with the voting) or listen to Eurobeat CD again. http://bit.ly/amjK8D #
• Fave mp3s, all CC-BY-NC-ND 2.5 Aus: http://bit.ly/cXQcui http://bit.ly/a57iA1 http://bit.ly/9J88GW http://bit.ly/9EXHPR http://bit.ly/aZCfM4 #
• But half the comedy value comes from the performances. Imagine the Greek woman's dress coming off halfway and Germans parodying Kraftwerk… #
• Delicious short fiction, my delicious friends! RT @Anke: Down a wrong path http://bit.ly/aOpX38 #fridayflash #vss #mfic (580 words) #

• Does anyone else by default assume tinnitus is actually your brain receiving a software upgrade from your robot dog overlords? #
• Did I say overlords? I meant protectors. #

• Another brilliant parody of #TFTD from Platitude of the Day. http://bit.ly/92AVy9 #
• Is it me, or is it getting… dark in here? http://bit.ly/diE6J2 [mp3] http://bit.ly/94s9jt [lyrics] #zork #nerdcore #
• Is there a difference between "positive discrimination" and "affirmative action", or does it just depend on whether you're in that minority? #
• #vss She slapped my host's face: "What's got into you?!" I smiled inwardly. The answer, of course, was me. #

• #ebz Starveling Kitty! Starveling Kitty! Ruled the roofs of five stolen cities! http://fallenlondon.com/c/90685 #
• #ebz The Bazaar is spoken of as a single living thing. Women call it 'he'; men call it 'she'. The… http://fallenlondon.com/c/90691 #
• Right, that's it. For some reason #TowelDay wasn't in Google Calendar by default, but I'm adding it now. #
• Oh, 6MB email attachments sent to the entire department, who doth know how I have missed thee. #netiquette #bugbears #anditwasasoddingbitmap #
• Just been to another leaving lunch. It's not fair. Booo. #
• I'm reading a Radio Times from 1977. Anyone who says the BBC hasn't dumbed down, I laugh in your general direction. #bringbackopenuniversity #

(If you're wondering who this CPS is that I so obviously think is too stupid to recognise hyperbole, read about the Paul Chambers case courtesy of Jack of Kent.)

• Give me painkillers or I give you DEATH (note to CPS… probably a joke, maybe) #ill #bleh #
• LOL ninjas. #news #ninjas http://bit.ly/diU5En #
• OK, it is now officially a Wheatus day. Get your sunny punkish rock here: http://bit.ly/cf4rZt http://bit.ly/9fIaT8 http://bit.ly/9uNCT1 #
• Blog spammers: All links in my comments are nofollowed, I have Akismet and I'm damn good at spotting spam, so what's the sodding point? FAIL #
• I'm up to my usual evil mindvirus tricks, this time ensuring anyone looking at the Olympic mascots now sees giant penises. (Also, the game.) #
• (I am sad that quiz-happy bloggers have co-opted the nobler meaning of "meme", such that I have to say "mindviruses" to avoid ambiguity.) #
• This @charltonbrooker genetics piece has Sonic the Hedgehog pic, but doesn't mention the Sonic Hedgehog gene path. WTF? http://bit.ly/daWlgF #
• (Yes there is an actual gene called SHH, which stands for Sonic Hedgehog Homologue. http://bit.ly/ODlig ) @charltonbrooker #
• (The hundred-legged chimeras @charltonbrooker mentions would in fact be created USING the Sonic Hedgehog morphogen. But enough of this.) #
• My little bro just dropped by the office. He's got a proper job now, and it's close to mine. We might actually get to see each other! \m/ #
• &%£@ing Firefox, if I have to cut/copy every URL twice before it works, I can see you're going to embarrass me horribly sometime. $&!£ you. #

• #vss The beautiful Athenian prince peered into the maze. Then she saw him pull out a TomTom. Tossing her ball of thread, Ariadne crept away. #
• #vss Luke's ears pricked at a distant voice. "Turn right in for-ty paces and con-tinue to follow the path." Tail sinking, he lay down again. #
• #vss Cindy leaned forward to the driver. "It says if we take River Drive we'll save 15 minutes." It gave her time to retrieve her lost shoe. #
• #vss "She's had so many husbands and so much surgery, I can't even tell how old she is." "Let's cut her down and count the rings." #

• Subsequent to my printing out my two personal emblems, our printer has run out of black ink. #
• My whole generation thinks that all you need in life is self-belief. I've just taken that to its logical conclusion. Got a problem with Me? #
• RT @CharlieClose: She looked down at her neighbour's cat. "Why do you always eat here? Is it because I feed you better than she?"#vss //THIS #

• #vss "For someone who embraces dark, mysterious, unnatural powers," said Weft, "you sure don't seem to understand women." #
• #vss It wasn't that he enjoyed the beatings, fearing for his life, coming home bruised. It was just what he knew. And he needed familiarity. #
• I saw a golden Cocker and she was tied up flopped in front of the Co-op and she was adrbl and I might've maybe brought her some water maybe. #
• #vss If I were working in Photoshop, I could drag a guide wherever I liked, make a mathematically perfect job. But this is hairdressing. #
• FLUORESCENCE and FLUORINE give you the FLU – they don't FLO! #mnemonic #bugbears #psa #
• #vss How quickly heat can lower inhibitions! The boss and I looked very fine shirtless. His monk friend was distressed in short sleeves. #
• So, all these people watching that reality singing whatever programme, mind if I call you all Friends of #Dorothy #
• Note to self: "Oh yeah, I once saw an episode of My Little Pony where that happened" is never an OK thing to say. Never. #
• FUCHSIA is spelled with FUCHS (German for "fox"). Don't fuch this one up or I'll hunt you down. #bugbears #psa #
• Finnish humppa band: You Really Got Me http://bit.ly/chOle3 Macarena http://bit.ly/9bPUNl Ace of Spades http://bit.ly/blgz1B via @ravenbait #

• Dreamed we found a cat beside our house. A tabby from a "missing" poster. Ben said it had rigor mortis, but it stirred when I touched it. #
• #vss Weft eyed the girl suspiciously. "She your latest porcupine, sir?" "My what?" asked Suitov. "Porcupine!" "Do… you mean… concubine?" #
• I am too muzzy to be in work. Can't brain. Fear not! I shall ponder going home all afternoon then leave at 17:00 as is usual in these cases. #
• I'm not really workaholic (and not that productive in this state anyway!) – it's just that nobody else is in who can care for my poor sites. #
• Rundown of the coalition policies: http://bit.ly/9LQrY1 I'm very annoyed at more faith schools. They are divisive and threatening. #
• It's 16:47 my predictions are NEVAR WRONG. Nobody's here to tell I'm leaving because the heat's making me ill, but I hope it's fixed anyway. #

• Has lunched in da club with mah homie @isntit. There was much real talk and also jibba-jabba. Shawty. #
• Also, the secret is out: I blush like a dork when young ladies ask me "OMG, was it YOU who did that???" #
• And now I am DED from the journey to London and back and a bit of travel-sickness. But I did read Dzur cover to cover on t'train. BRILLIANT. #
• Also, my deerhound-in-the-headlights look when @isntit said "@Metaltax has told me about you…" would no doubt have amused some of you! :-p #
• #vss Upon meeting the anthropomorphic cat, Weft tore his self-esteem to shreds, ridiculing his claws in favour of knives and nimble fingers. #
• #vss He'd never courted fame, yet somehow, he always seemed to be dressed distinctively, waving his signature weapon, quipping and rescuing. #
• #vss Weft's victims were "targets" beforehand, "messages" afterwards. He felt no remorse. He'd been sent to kill them, so they must be evil. #
• #vss Suitov detested assassins, which caused no end of speculation as to why he let one follow him around like a vicious, grey-clad puppy. #
• #vss After constant nagging not to wear black ALL the time, Suitov sometimes wore very dark green. Not a victory, Weft thought, but a start. #
• #vss Weft had been instructed to smash the target's face until she was unrecognisable. Afterwards he returned to the monastery and threw up. #

• Has lunched in da club with mah homie @isntit. There was much real talk and also jibba-jabba. Shawty. #
• Also, the secret is out: I blush like a dork when young ladies ask me "OMG, was it YOU who did that???" #
• And now I am DED from the journey to London and back and a bit of travel-sickness. But I did read Dzur cover to cover on t'train. BRILLIANT. #
• Also, my deerhound-in-the-headlights look when @isntit said "@Metaltax has told me about you…" would no doubt have amused some of you! :-p #
• #vss Upon meeting the anthropomorphic cat, Weft tore his self-esteem to shreds, ridiculing his claws in favour of knives and nimble fingers. #
• #vss He'd never courted fame, yet somehow, he always seemed to be dressed distinctively, waving his signature weapon, quipping and rescuing. #
• #vss Weft's victims were "targets" beforehand, "messages" afterwards. He felt no remorse. He'd been sent to kill them, so they must be evil. #
• #vss Suitov detested assassins, which caused no end of speculation as to why he let one follow him around like a vicious, grey-clad puppy. #
• #vss After constant nagging not to wear black ALL the time, Suitov sometimes wore very dark green. Not a victory, Weft thought, but a start. #
• #vss Weft had been instructed to smash the target's face until she was unrecognisable. Afterwards he returned to the monastery and threw up. #

• First winner in the #kitty #poetry puzzle! Her answer has been verified. Her cat was not imprrressed. Any more guesses? http://bit.ly/9LkUGs #
• UnSmilin' Stan Lee passes sentence on GlaDOS's great-great-great-great grandmother: http://bit.ly/9iVlmy #
• Oh Falconer, Falconer. lolz. http://www.last.fm/music/Falconer/_/Under+the+Sword #powermetal #
• Big train journey to London tomorrow for a briefing on a Project Genome, aka "we're scanning in a lot of old magazines". Exciting, actually. #
• Is nipping out to buy a postcard to send @cubicgarden. The weirdest, corniest one I can find. For great justice. #getwellsoonian #
• Got a card shaped like a zebra. Don't tell Ian, but I'm sending him a dirty magazine! http://www.maplin.co.uk/images/300/CA31j_09.jpg #
• wtf retri pally tankin w pvp gear wondrin y he no getin aggro noob! RT @upsidedowndogs: http://bit.ly/a0F5cy //Doggies make me talk nonsense #
• Red Dead looks so good. And yet we never did play GTA 4. It's sitting right there in its box. What happened to us? Oh yeah, you took up WoW. #

• http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/clips/p007x2h0 testing out the new BBC Comedy website, made by @binhbui and @metaltax and others. It's shiny! #
• http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/clips/p005qg9h Bwahaha. Not very balanced, but oh so true. #ge2010 #leadersdebate #cassetteboy #
• FTW! RT @MediaCityUK: RT @mhemmaty: http://twitpic.com/1ouy2e – The bus drivers at salford are legends! #
• Niiiiice. http://dragginart.deviantart.com/art/Ice-Dragon-11688316 #dragons @Anke, s/he's done a series of seasonal #owls too. #